Don't fuck with a man that sleeps next to a woman he never screws. They're unpredictable.

"Don't mess with him...Trust me, you don't fuck with a man that sleeps next to a woman he never screws. They're unpredictable."
-- ShitMyDadSays

You don’t just grab a ruler and tell everyone to whip their dicks out...

“Calm down. You don’t just grab a ruler and tell everyone to whip their dicks out. You stuff your crotch and keep your pants on.”
-- ShitMyDadSays